BTCC, or Back To Cherished Championship
So, the countdown is over! The 4Fun guys are celebrating since finally, and after deciding to have days of 28 hours instead of 24 in order to attend to his multiple tasks, Omer Kinay is consistently back on the track and on his cherished BTCC championship with the Nissan Primera. Well, we could end here this report and stay in silent adoration after saying that, but the show must go on! Still with a little rust on his wheel, Kinay debuted with a third place after a couple of unlucky contacts, while after the race the two drivers that preceded him turned themselves in to the Police as self-confessed of lese Majesty. But instant kharma immediately got Kinay, who had then four wins in a row spreading in the air a gentle flavor of victory, making also happy Gianluca Roncaglia that now has a new way to use his abacus on counting Kinay’s wins. “I’m happy with my return! It was a wonderful week, and I can’t wait for the next races”, said Kinay “I’m only frightened of the idea of being once again for 20 minutes behind David Broomhead in a race, but this time I’ll be prepared and will drive blindfolded: I don’t need to see when driving the Primera, the engine and car sounds and a caress at my car baby are enough for me”.
But the good news of the week aren’t gone yet: after an unlucky race with the vintage Toyota AE86 in the Charade track in Clermont-Ferrand, where he had more incidents than in his whole SRS career and after stopping in a brasserie for a plateau of Camembert and Roquefort with Ted Hough, Venuti turned his “one shot one kill” mode on gaining a win and a no-news pile of excellent placements in every drivable thing running on SRS, forcing also Roncaglia to buy a second abacus to keep the team statistics updated.
And it was also an intense and profitable week for Dario Bucalo, that first of all sent to all the participants to the Team Championship the list of the rules (six in-folio volumes), then received an honoris causa PhD in Mathematics and Physics from Oxford after solving Fermat’s theorem and finding a Fourth Law of Motion – “if a body is moving, it will be proportionally behind Kinay and Venuti” – thanks to the Excel spreadsheet formulas he uses for calculating the Team Championship points. Moreover, Bucalo got his third SRS win in a – euphemism – not so strong race where he lapped all the opponents, facing also a stroke of sleep with few laps to go, and where in order to spice up things a little he also tried to lap himself. Fair and decent as usual, Bucalo wasn’t that happy for the result, only celebrating with a glass of lemonade instead that bathing in champagne as he did for his previous win, buying only one new mod instead of five and also refusing Roncaglia’s offer to sell him the win for 3 dollars and a packet of bubble gums.
As for Gianluca Roncaglia, he had to face an insanely tremendous week, ended with a scary 4th place with the BMW 235i as a best result. As usual his teammates supported him by checking his setups, his race and ambient data and a bunch of stats, and after a deep analysis they concluded that – he sucks. Since 4Fun is a team, Kinay, Bucalo and Venuti helped their teammate in trouble: Kinay told to a sadly nodding Roncaglia that in order to turn left he has to move the wheel on the left, and vice versa to turn right; Bucalo showed him the difference between the brake and the throttle pedal – and right after he modded both; Venuti dispensed his usual wisdom pill: “Add enough fuel, and go”. After talking with Venuti and Michal Janak, still debating on how to prolong their challenge off track, Roncaglia also decided to try relaxing with a new hobby. Janak and Venuti suggested car models and archery, but Roncaglia dropped model building after getting all his fingers and wears covered in glue, and also archery after piercing his own car tire with an arrow at his first throw. Well, hold on, a new racing week is yet to come and thousands of new hobbies are waiting for a try!
Playlist of the week:
Jonathan Richman & the Modern Lovers – Back in Your Life (for Omer Kinay)
Radio Birdman – New Race (for Matteo Venuti)
Molly Hatchet – Flirtin’ with Disaster (for Gianluca Roncaglia)
Randy Newman – Lonely at the Top (for Dario Bucalo)